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7 Reasons Why Being in a Relationship is the Best

Posted in Lifestyle, Relationships by

Photo by Almos Bechtold on Unsplash

A few weeks ago I had a post saying why being single is the worst. By popular request, I was encouraged to write about why being in a relationship is the best! For those of you who have your doubts about relationships or are hesitant of what they have in store for you, let me help put your mind at ease with 7 reasons why being in a relationship is the best. It’s also a list to help you understand why I missing being in a relationship as opposed to being single.

1. Be yourself

When you’re dating, you’re constantly seeing new people while on your best behavior. But in a relationship, you’ve been with this person for a while, so you can start to open up more and be yourself. You can now take your bra off and throw on a baggy hoodie with your favorite pajama pants and forget about putting on make-up! They already know you snort when you laugh hard and always get the lyrics wrong regardless of how many times you’ve heard the song. This is (arguably) the best part about a relationship because your partner loves you for who you are as a person and that’s beautiful enough.

2. Plus-One

You’ll always have friends that can be this as well, but now you always have a go-to for your plus-one for work events, weddings, or any other social events. The best part about having this person be your partner is that everyone is already expecting it! Now your friends won’t get butt-hurt if you choose one over the other, you have a default.

Related Reading: How to Handle Getting Hit on at a Bar

3. Feeling the love

Photo by Becca Tapert on Unsplash

One of the greatest perks of a relationship is the physical aspect, and you all know what I mean… Not only is sex fun, it’s good for you! All that dopamine in your brain is the ultimate high, but it’s even better when you’re sleeping with someone who appreciates you for more than your physical appearance. The entire mindset is altered, making the experience that much better. Not to sound like a love guru or preachy, but it is an experience where you’re selfless; you become a team in wanting to make each other feel good! It’s probably the best team bonding experience you can have.

4. Feeling appreciated

Dates are great, I will always be a fan of free food and movies, but being in a relationship is more than that. Once you’ve opened up and let someone in, they know your biggest dreams, fears and stresses. All those things become priorities to them too; they want to see you succeed, be happy and pick you up when you’re feeling down. I’ve bought flowers for guys before just because I wanted to, and they loved it! The little things can add up, even if it’s just a compliment on how you look that day or someone telling you they love you.

5. You always have someone to talk to

From my perspective, your partner should be one of your best friends. If there’s something on your mind, you have someone you can talk to about it and they’ll give you their honest opinion. They’re comforting or give you a reality check when you need one. But mostly, they’re there to listen. And that in itself is extremely important.

6. There’s someone to fill your time

Remember all that time you had to swipe left and right on those dating apps? Now you have time to spend with someone instead of doing that. Someone who will do whatever you want to; hike, go to dinner, a movie, a museum, or Netflix…and chill… You now have options to fill your time with more entertaining things with someone who values you and your time.

7. You learn

Photo by Kate on Unsplash

Something in you also changes. When you have someone you’re crazy about, and they’re crazy about you too, it bumps your self esteem, making you happier overall. When you’re happier, you also want the people around you to be happy, so you give more and it makes you feel good! Being in a relationship teaches you a lot about yourself: your interests, priorities, what makes you happy, mad, sad. But it also teaches you that about other people; and with that comes empathy which enforces honesty, trust and dedication.

 

There are so many things I miss about being in a relationship. I realize a lot of these things can also be fulfilled by friends, but it’s not the same. There’s that intimacy aspect to being in a relationship that is so special and makes you feel and think differently from others around you. I’m a fan of being in a relationship, but only when it’s with the right person. If you’re hesitant to enter into a relationship, you should think about all the benefits it has to offer before you dismiss the thought.

 

What are some of your favorite things about being in a relationship? Did I miss anything?

March 12, 2018
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6 Reasons Why Being Single is the Worst

Posted in Lifestyle, Relationships by

My love life is a mess. I was what people call “a prude” throughout (most) of high school. When I got to college I was still “prudish”, but open to trying new things. I didn’t go crazy, but I did figure out what it was like to kiss someone who didn’t try to suck my face off. I learned the difference between good and bad, right and wrong, big and small… One of the most important things that I’ve learned is that being single when you’re 25 sucks. Since we already have a post saying how being single is okay, I’ve decided to make one saying why being single is the worst.

Related Reading: 3 Reasons to Love Being Single

In the beginning…

I want to start by giving you a little history on my love life. I’ve had two serious relationships. One was my freshman year of college and we dated for about a year, long distance. Then I went four years just dating (a.k.a Tinder, Plenty of Fish, random guys at parties) where nothing really interesting happened; well except for that one guy. The guy who was sleeping with me, while patching things up with his ex (which I didn’t know) and gave me an STD. I stalked his ex and told her to get tested and he got mad and called me a bitch and yada yada it was all my fault even though it was all his and he was being a big baby who didn’t get his way, whatever.

After that, I got with some guy who was mutual friends with my friend. We messed around and had fun, but he was (and still is) too immature, so we stopped after about a month.

When I was 24, I started a new job where I worked closely with one other girl in sales. We became close friends and she invited me to her wedding. This is where I met the guy I would be in my second longest relationship with. He was a year younger than me and he treated me like a princess, up until he became paranoid that I was cheating on him and then he cheated on me… I still don’t understand how that makes sense AT ALL.

Related Reading: The Things He Said, My Toxic Relationship

Now

So I’ve been single for about a year now, talking with guys off of various dating sites (Bumble being in the hot seat right now) and mistakenly sleeping with the guy I had messed around with after college again (don’t act like you’ve never gone back to an ex). The thing about becoming single after a serious relationship is that I’m reminded how good it is to be in a relationship. And then, it’s over and I’m back to square one.

kaboompics_Blonde woman having a healthy snack at the wooden pier

Here are the worst things about being single:

  1. Starting over

    Dating is awkward because I have to learn people all over again. Especially online dating, because I can’t get a genuine feeling about someone until we’re face to face. So sometimes it feels like I’m wasting all that time messaging someone I just don’t feel a connection with when we finally do meet. That sucks.

  2. No excuse

    When I go out with girlfriends to the bar, I can’t say that I have a boyfriend at home. Which, granted this can (does) work in my favor sometimes. I have such a heavy guilty conscience that I can’t lie well. So now I have to say I’m not interested and gamble him following me around the whole night or leaving it at that.

  3. Dry Spell

    You know exactly what that means. Toys are great, hook-ups are risky and repeats are frowned upon. There’s just no winning with this one. It’s just not the same.

  4. I have to buy things myself

    Yeah, I know how that sounds, but it’s the truth. Everyone likes getting spoiled by someone else. Personally, I enjoy being treated to dinner and a movie. I especially like getting flowers randomly. Sure, friends and family can do this, but it’s a different feeling when it’s from your boyfriend/girlfriend.

  5. It’s lonely

    I’m used to texting someone constantly throughout the day, and now that’s gone. No one to tell me they can’t wait to see me or tell me how beautiful they think I am. Not just that, but my boyfriend was my best friend; the one I could talk to about anything and not worry about being judged. I could be goofy, and he would never call me anything that would make me feel stupid or ugly. I always felt wanted.

  6. There’s a lot of free time

 It is a strange thing to complain about, but I like being busy. When I’m by myself, I think too much; I want to constantly be working to distract myself from how sucky life is (the 9-5 job, trying to plan days out with friends with a $5 budget, being a 5th wheel etc.). When I feel really down I think about all the things that I can do to change myself: being more patient, less pushy, less critical, put in more effort (tangent: I once had a boyfriend that asked me why I wasn’t wearing make up on a Sunday, saying he was always trying to look good for me, so why wouldn’t I reciprocate…). There’s a lot of dark thoughts I started to think about myself and my worth when the person I thought could be my forever bangs someone else.

Related Reading: How to Handle Getting Hit on at a Bar11 Messages You’ll Get on Plenty of Fish

This isn’t to say that there aren’t any good things about being single, there are. But let us not dwell on all the good things like actually having time for your friends, hogging the whole bed and farting without embarrassment in the comfort of your own home. It’s okay to say how much things suck sometimes.

 

What are your thoughts on being single?

 

February 21, 2018
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